At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
