I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
