it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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