That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
