Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize