we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
