For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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