they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
