I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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