If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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