yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
There r osticjed everywhere
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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