My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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