You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
