the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
