I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
