My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
