how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
