Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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