i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
