You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
