Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
