How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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