i may or may not be watching the land before time
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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