whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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