Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
