i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
