The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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