Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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