i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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