I've blown a few things in my day
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
