just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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