using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
