talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
