is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
