Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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