Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Randomize
