There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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