i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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