PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
