I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
