everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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