your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
