this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Are we still banned from the library?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
