he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
