We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize