Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
