mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
