Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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