is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize
