If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
